Monogram Etiquette 101:
Your Guide to Correct Monogram Styles
A monogram can be listed a few different ways and still be correct when it comes to monogram etiquette
Option 1: Individual monogram for the bride or the groom
These will appear one of two ways depending on the font/style
Style One: Larger Middle Letter
Traditionally, a monogram reads First Name Initial, Last Name Initial, Middle Name or Maiden Name Initial. With the Last Name Initial being the larger Middle Initial. For example, if you had the name Nicole Logan Montalbano, her monogram would read NML.
Style Two: Letters All the Same Size or Block Monogram
This style of monogram traditionally reads First Name Initial, Middle Name Initial, Last Name Initial with all the letters being the same size in line with one another. For example, if you had the name Nicole Logan Montalbano, her monogram would read NLM.
Option 2: His and Hers Monogram
When it comes to monogram etiquette, there are two schools of thought on the order in which a couple’s monogram should appear and either order is acceptable. We recommend that once an order for initials is decided on that all future items are monogrammed in this same order for aesthetic purposes, but that’s just us! There’s no right or wrong way to style your family monogram!
Style One: Ladies First
The wife’s first name initial, the couple’s married last name initial in the center and largest letter followed by the husband’s first name initial. For example, Nicole & Ryan Montalbano would be NMR.
Style Two: Mr. & Mrs.
If you’re all for tradition, then you could have your monogram appear in the order husband’s first name initial with the last name initial larger in the middle and the wife’s first name initial last. The theory here and that a man’s first name and last name should not be separated.
Option 3: Single Initial
Style One: First Name Initial
Some trinkets are great with just a single first initial. With this, you can add a little flare to the design by adding dots or flourishes on either side of the letter or a frame around the letter. First name of Nicole would appear as a single “N.” This style is popular for unmarried young women.
Style Two: Last Name Initial
The single last name letter is great for barware, towels and stationary. This would appear as a single “M” for a couple with the last name Montalbano.
Pre-Wedding Monograms
Should a married monogram or maiden monogram be used for events preceding the wedding? When should the bride debut her married monogram?
It depends on how superstitious the bride is! someone who is newly engaged, is Likely excited to have a new monogram and the anticipation and excitement grows each day! With the popularity of robes, button downs and outfits for getting ready, brides typically debut their new monogram at that time. As for monograms during the engagement, etiquette says to use your first name initials together. So, Nicole and Ryan would be N&R or R&N depending on the order chosen.
What is the etiquette on registering for monogrammed items?
Go for it! Just be sure to include some guidelines for the gift givers! Consider having the hosts of your showers include a card with monogram information for the couple, the bride and the groom. These guidelines help make sure your gifts are personalized to your preferences as many stores do not allow returns for personalized items especially ones where the monogram is more than a single initial.
Other Monogram Etiquette Questions
How would you create a couple’s monogram if the wife is keeping her maiden name?
Her maiden name would take place of the middle name initial. For example, Kelsie Elizabeth Vogds now becomes Kelsie Vogds Robinson or KRV if she were to choose to keep her maiden name.
How do you list monogram initials for someone with two middle names? Or a hyphenated last name? Or no middle name? What about the Von, O and Mc prefixes?
Two Middle Names
Block style is your best bet here as many fonts are predesigned for three letter monograms. Sometimes a font typically used for a three-letter monogram can allow for stacking of the two middle initials that appear on the right side of the monogram. Because they are stacked, they will be smaller than the left initial or first name. You can also choose to drop one of the middle names for monogramming leaving you with three initials for the traditional three letter monogram.
Hyphenated Last Name
Use a four-letter monogram where the two last names would be the larger letters with smaller first name initials on either side. Sometimes the four-letter monogram style can be a little overwhelming for a small item. Not sure how to monogram – ask the couple how they would prefer it to appear. They might decide to opt for the two-letter monogram for both last names.
No Middle Name
No middle name, no worries! Use your two initials or opt for your first or last name only!
The Von, O’ and Mc
Seems complicated with having a prefix or article with the last name, but it’s quite simple – use the first letter of the last name! So “Christy Anna von Burg” = CAV or CAB, Shelly Katherine O’Hare = SKO and Anna Claire McDougal = ACM.
How do same-sex partners build their monogram?
Same sex partners can follow any of the above rules. Popular monogram options for same sex couples if they are both keeping their last names is to use a two-letter monogram side by side or stacked with the last name initials together or use a four-letter monogram with the two last names larger in the middle.
Are there tips for picking the style of monogram to use?
With so many options, it can be confusing which style should be picked! But, that’s the beauty of it being personalized and uniquely yours! Depending on your style and personal preference, the choice is up to you! Expecting to receive some personalized gifts for your upcoming nuptials? Be sure to let guests know your preferred initial order.
Is there anywhere that a single letter monogram would be appropriate rather than a three-letter monogram, and vice versa?
It’s all up to the couple/individual or gift giver! Oftentimes, we see single letter initials used on items that will be used for decoration or most commonly, linens. Typically, a single letter monogram and most commonly the first letter of the couple’s last name is used on items such as napkins, towels and barware. For an individual, the first letter of the first name or last name is also appropriate.
One of my bridesmaids is getting married soon after my wedding. How should I monogram her bridesmaid gift?
Our vote is to use her new married monogram! She’ll be able to enjoy your oh so thoughtful gift for years to come.
Other Frequently Asked Questions
What is your refund policy?
Due to the custom nature of embroidered goods, all sales on personalized items are final. Please proofread all spelling and order details prior to checkout (or on order Proof) and always feel free to email me with any questions at hello@southernstitchesATL.com
What is your Current Turnaround Time?
2 Weeks Excluding Shipping Time for In-Stock Inventory. (All Inventory in our customizable collection and Scallop Bath Towels Are readily kept on-Hand to Meet This Turnaround Time). Items with a Longer Lead Time than Our Standard Turnaround Time are Denoted in the Item Description.
Shipping Policy
We offer Flat Rate Shipping for $5.00 per order or Porch Pickup Options in the Atlanta Area. Once you are ready to checkout you will be able to choose your shipping preferences. We currently only ship within the United States.
Do you Offer Proofs?
Yes - We offer Proofs by Request. Please select the Option at Checkout if you would like an Emailed Proof prior to Stitching.
Will my purchases be used for promotion of Southern Stitches online and on social media?
By purchasing from Southern Stitches, customers acknowledge and agree that we reserve the right to use images of the items they purchase for marketing and promotional purposes, including on our website and social media channels. Such images may include the monogrammed names or initials of the Customer or customer's child. Customers understand that these images may be used to showcase our products and services and to promote our business. Customers acknowledge that they will not be entitled to any compensation or royalties in connection with our use of these images. If customers do not wish to have their purchased items' images used for marketing purposes, they must notify us in writing at the time of purchase.
Payment / Invoice Policy
Blank Items are Not Purchased (Custom Orders) and Stitching Does Not Begin (All Orders) Until Payment is Received for Purchase or Invoice.
Can colors on designs be changed?
Yes! All designs and Fonts are fully customizable. Please let us know if you have questions about thread or fabric pairings - we are happy to help!